Hi!

Life can be so ______________.  And crazy sometimes too.  I love this bunch of ladies.  We are all so different and yet so much alike.  Dance classes brought us together but making the effort to connect, to become real and genuine friends has taken us far beyond casual acquaintances.So how did all this come about? 

Well, after years of being a single mom "it" finally happened.  The day came when the boys no longer needed me to take them places, pay for things, fix things and pressure them into doing right things.  And after that came the day my oldest left home.  After fighting really hard for his dream, he joined the Army and is doing soldier things on the other side of the world.  And then - you guessed it, a few weeks ago my baby left home too.

For twenty one years, my life has revolved around them.  I wish I could say that motherhood was all I ever longed for and that every moment was beautiful.  It wasn't.  Coming from a broken background made parenting a huge challenge for me.  But I knew they were innocent, and I wanted more than anything else to give them as normal a life as possible.  And, I think we made that happen in a bumpy but good kind of way.

Baseball games, church, friends and just hanging out together as our little threesome.  In many ways I wouldn't change a thing, but if I could, about the only thing I might do differently, is make more time for me; put a little more effort into maintaining an identity apart from being a "mom".

But I didn't start to do that until I realized well into their teens that they were going to leave home soon.  And it broke my heart.  They are the closest thing to normal family relationships I'll probably ever know.  The hole they would leave seemed as vast as the ocean.  Not so much because I loved being a mom; I was actually growing weary from all the "mom stuff" we need to do.  But because once they were gone, I would be back to square one.  Alone.  And that was too much - unthinkable, unbearable.

Just about the time I was sliding a little too far down into depression, something wonderful happened.  Something that changed my life forever.  Dance.  Actually, dance and I are old friends.  But I left it behind when I became a wife.  In many ways it has been making its journey alongside me all of my life.  Botched ballet classes at thirteen, another attempt in college.  Two-stepping through the bar scene in late teens and early twenties, and about once a year after becoming a single.  But then one day it showed up again in a way so glorious it could not be ignored.

Away on a business trip, sipping margaritas and eating delectable Tex-Mex - the floor in front of me became a spicy-hot Latin Salsa club.  And I was mesmerized. At soon as I got back home I immediately looked up dance lessons and the rest is history.

The classes and friendships have rescued my life in so many ways.  One by one, the group of us in the photo above met, connected and linked arms.  We meet most every Friday night for "Girls Dinner" followed by dancing with all of our buddies from our studio and the others in town.  And we dance. Everyone is so gracious and makes the effort to include everyone so we all get to have a great time.  I love that.  I love that we "see" each other.

Though I'm still hammering out the shape of life without my boys at home, and I still don't know what I want to be when I "grow up", I am pursuing dance as though it were an Olympic Sport; which fills the void.  Writing and public speaking have become important to me, and joining a Toastmasters Club is helping meet that desire.

So....here is this blog; a snippet from the life of someone who has been an adult from a very early age, and single most all my life. And I would love to hear from you.  I would love to hear your hopes, dreams and struggles as singles, single parents and real people.